found an old pocket journal of mine...

so here are some of the things i found that i'd written (i think this journal is from spring/summer 07)-->

-----------------
the thickness of the morning air
consumes a moment
of utter solitude

and i'm at a loss
a loss for words
a loss for what

i hate being at a loss

-------------------
"live politely" said her sign
her silver hair cascading in gentle
curls down to her protruding
collar bones draw all attention to her
placid face adorned with the
jewels of time and wisdom
she sat, eyes closed, crossed legged,
peaceful
homeless
beautiful
content
i find myself wanting
what she has--which is
nothing--but apparently
everything
------------------
painting palates of present and past
hiding history, not to keep
southern yellow, manhattan palace
subtle glimpses of what's to be
brush strokes cover childhood
across the walls of where she sleeps
to dream of future to dream of past
to move a home and not to weep
-----------------------------

devil! devil! hear me well
today i've found a soul to sell
and in return i ask one thing
remove yourself from my midnight dreams

---------
dance with me in twilight song
never cease to hold me strong
---------


certainly uncertain, billows old music.
incantations flowing in beat.
persuading diamonds to lie
because they aren't a girl's best friend
but sparkles enchant those who touch a diamond
but diamonds are made of coal
prisoner of war in this battle between the whores
deep within the city and their reluctant drugs
that whist them away to the bedrooms of the faceless
men searching for acceptance in a city
that will never cease to reject them
until they can pay to sell their soul to the bottomless
depths of hell that is this city

------------------------------

okay. it's official
blueberry pancakes
can fix anything
especially if eaten
whilst alone

they really can
solve all of the world's problems

so lets all get the big guys
and eat blueberry pancakes
in silence

---------------------------

today feels like
a cup of tea
forgotten
in its porcelain beauty
left in the sun
cup and saucer
like warm snow

--------------------
sometimes i think
the sky is mine
and nobody else's
--------------

new york city is almost gone
dying from within
not only in my silent soul
dissolving in my sin

---------