this isn't supposed to happen.

It's that moment, that second
when you're alone.
really, truely alone
and it doesn't just hit you,
it steals your breath, shakes your brain
spins the room, makes sound obsolete
blurs the world you thought you saw

it turns everything you thought
upside down
and round and round
makes your body heavy and light
at the same time

and it's like everying in the world
collides at once right in front of you
but you can't move or breathe
or think or exist outside this one moment
that pauses your world, and steals your being
nobody else exists, matters
because you reluctantly
let yourself be hit, just now
by the impossible.

that for once...once...your soul
listened to your heart
and not your head
and you're angry because
its your heart....yours...
and apparantly it's stronger
than your head, your willpower

and it makes you loose control
and forget everything
and everything becomes possible
like taking off in an airplane
and you can feel it like heat
you become
sensationalized
captivated
lost in the motionless movement
of everything

and it tightens your heart
it can't beat.
momentarily frozen on fire